Survivor

This weekend marks the one year anniversary of Hurricane Helene and the eighth weekend after my last radiation treatment. I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about life changing events and survivorship. In the cancer world I have been really interested in the multiple definitions of when you can say you are a survivor. Some say the day you are diagnosed, some the day you finish treatment, others say when you meet the milestone of five years clear. I am not sure where I land on the topic - it’s complicated to say the least.

My wife and I were reminiscing about Helene the other evening and she stated, “we survived that.” Just the word peaks my interest. I remember this summer about halfway through treatment a grocery store clerk asked me if I was “surviving the summer.” I responded that her choice of words intrigued me and that I was going through radiation treatment. She asked me if she could pray, and after I said yes she grabbed my hand and begin to pray. It was special. I saw her for the first time since yesterday and told her how special it was, and that yes I survived the summer!

I think surviving hurricanes and cancer have a lot in common. Of course both are traumatic events and our bodies store them. Now anytime the winds pick up during a storm my shoulders get a little tighter as if waiting for the big crash like a year ago. It’s similar with odd aches and pains in the body and the news of those you care about getting life changing diagnosis - my body braces for what’s to come.

This past week my therapist asked me what I thought was the same and what I thought was different now that I am several months post treatment. I found it really difficult to answer the question around what was the same! I am not sad about this - just highly curious. No doubt after a storm like Helene or cancer things are not the same.

I look forward to diving into this concept of change and growth and who knows - maybe I will share some of it here. I sure have missed this platform!

PS - Slim wanted me to share that he continues to work hard to reach all sides of my mouth. He is working hard to taste everything - most things are getting there. Fortunately - I think - fried foods are the only thing that doesn’t really taste. Sadly, sweets taste amazing!!!

Thanks for reading - I welcome your thoughts on change!